We do share this world

“We don’t live in this world alone.” Is what my father would say to me all the time when I was growing up. He cared so much what the neighbours thought, what the relatives thought and what his friends thought. I think sometimes he wouldn’t even care if we went somewhere but he had to stick to his “What if someone sees you come home late.” He meant well, that was just his mentality.

In life, we are taught to respect people and treat them the way we want to be treated. In fact, I teach that same belief to my own children. We do not live in this world alone and we should care a little what others think because it is not a nice feeling when others look down on something we did. I do think that has a limit. I do not believe that we should care to the extent of doing things that we do not want to do, because it will make us, or our children look good.

I think we all do our best to be good people in this world. We do what we can to help the people we love and people we don’t even know. This is what humanity is all about. That is what separates us from other mammals; we have morals, values, and a conscience. For our friends, we do what we can to make them happy; sometimes we try to accommodate them to make something a little easier for them, even though it may be harder for us. We like to see others happy, it makes us feel good.

Last night I was having a conversation with my mother (who is still in Florida btw..lol) and we were talking about something (not important) and she said this to me, “You know, you cannot please everyone all the time. Sometimes you have to do what is best for you and your family.” She has said this to me a million times before, but for some reason it really stuck in my head.

Sometimes I think we feel pressure to be the best at everything we do. We worry that we are not being good parents, good friends, good daughters/sons, or good spouses. We put this stress on our shoulders because we want everything to always go right and to satisfy everyone. We do it so much, that we forget why we are doing it in the first place. We forget that sometimes we need to put our happiness first, before anyone else’s’. It is ok to want to help people, or do something nice for someone else, but we don’t have to. It is not something we should not be obliged to do. It can be very tiring trying to make others happy.

Sometimes I see this happening with my kids. My son will trade a “good” hockey card because his friend wants it, even though he loves that card. Or my daughter will take a bead off her dress because her friend Sophia liked it. I try to explain to them what my own mother explained to me, “Don’t give up something you really like to make someone else happy, if that is not what you really want to do.” I tell them that if they are really your friend they would not expect you to take that bead off your dress, or give up that card that they know is special.

Give what you want to give. Do what you want to do. In the end, someone will not like you anymore, or respect you anymore because you gave up something that really wanted or liked, for them. I think it is nice to be a good person to everyone as often as you can, but I also believe you shouldn’t do something because others may think you are bad if you don’t. It is true, we must share the world with millions of others, but it is also true that we should live it for our own merit and not for someone else. I do try to live a good life, a happy life, but I do it for me and my family; not others.
That’s my peace today!

Fried Cauliflower and Oyster Mushrooms
1 cauliflower cut into little trees
1 pound oyster mushrooms
1/2 cup flour
2 eggs beaten
salt
oil for frying

Wash cauliflower and mushrooms. Dip in egg and then in flour. Heat oil on medium high. Fry each little tree and mushroom for 6-7 minutes (golden) and drain on paper towel, salt.