Momma said there'd be days like this

Being a parent is not easy. You have good days, and you have bad days...and then you have really bad days. Sometimes I wonder why there isn’t warning labels on pregnancy tests. Something like “WARNING...your future will forever change and there aint no way of turning back so hold on, and don’t ever let go”. We are warned by many of our peers, and from our very own mothers, but for some reason it doesn’t mean anything until you go through it.

Over the weekend I was at my parent’s house. My husband was working and I was there with the twins. Merly and Joseph had gone out with my sister and aunt. My dad was upstairs doing some stuff and me and my mom were in the basement, just chatting. I was looking at the weekly flyers and my mother was sitting on the couch. Michael and Jenna decided to play. When I say play, I mean, they decided to stand on the couch and jump. In one second, I hear a bang; I jump up and see Jenna had fallen backwards flat on her head from the couch. The basement has ceramic tiles, with a thin area rug. I ran towards her, she was crying a little and then...OMG...I was not prepared for what happened next.

Jenna‘s eyes began to roll in the back of her head and her whole body went limp, she looked like she stopped breathing. I ran with my mother to the sink, Jenna in arms, and we threw water on her face. Nothing! She was not moving, she was not responsive. I panicked! I began screaming, “Call 911, Call 911!” My father ran downstairs because he heard all the commotion. He took over. I was on the phone with 911:
“911...what’s your emergency?”
“My daughter fell, she’s not breathing, she’s not responding”
“Ok Mom, calm down.”

At that moment, my dad yelled out, “She’s breathing, she’s breathing.” I gasp and told the operator she was now breathing. “Paramedics are on the way.” Is what she assured me. My daughter looked frail and week; I could not believe what had just happened.

Kids fall all the time, they bump their heads; they cry; you put ice on the bump; and they are ok. Not this time. When I looked at my daughter, I thought we had lost her. I thought she hit her tiny little head so hard that it was just too much for her to handle. I don’t know what I was thinking at the moment I was screaming to call 911, and I don’t know how I even had the brains to find the phone, I just kept thinking in my mind, “this can’t be happening, how could this be happening?” We were just sitting there doing nothing, how can we now be calling the ambulance.

The fire department arrived first. (911 now knew she was responsive). They assessed her, and we waiting for the EMT. They then arrived, assessed her and reassured me she was ok. The paramedics explained to me that she most likely got the wind knocked out of her because she did not have a bump on her head. He then said to me that kid’s bones are a lot more resilient than we think. He did tell me to keep an eye on her and to wake her up several times that night to make sure she was responsive. In the meantime, my other daughter arrived back with my aunt, and my sister arrived back with Joseph. Everyone was surprised to see what the heck they had missed. My poor little 6 year old began to cry when she found out her baby sister had fallen. Ironically enough, she had just come back from buying a very shiny sticker that said, “I love my sister.”

As we were sitting there with the firefighters, paramedics, and police people (yes they came too). They said exactly what I was thinking; “When you have children, you have to expect things like this. They will fall, and they will scare you when they do, the only important thing is that you can joke about it after, and if you can, you know it’s just part of the process.”

When you become a parent you are never prepared for all the “unfun” things of it. You buy diapers for their pee and poo; you buy baby body wash for their baths; and you buy pj’s for their naps. You never want to prepare for the moments you will be screaming, searching for the phone, and calling 911. These are the things we wish we can skip. These are the parts of parenthood that we never want to go through. But I guess what doesn’t kill you, does make you stronger..I hope.

I cannot explain to you the feeling I had when I thought my Jenna was not going to make it. It was surreal, it was unimaginable, I wanted to just shake it all off and pretend it was not happening. The worst thing they tell you not to do in a situation is panic. But how can you not panic when you see your 2 year old daughter limp, and unresponsive? It’s harder than you can imagine.

I later asked Jenna where she did “boo boo”? and she pointed to her back. Your back? What? I guess that’s why she did not have a bump, and I guess she really did get the wind knocked out of her. Thank God my father was there to take over because me and mother needed our own resuscitator to help us breathe..lol. I am glad I can now laugh about it, and I can now add it to the list of things I get to tell my kids when they are older why they almost gave me heart failures. I guess I will just add it to the list of life, and mother hood. I guess I will just define it as one of those days... because my momma said there’d be days like this, and I guess we both should have known that.
That’s my peace today!

Rustica
1 pizza dough
8 slices of provonle cheese
1 cup shredded mozzarella and fontina cheese
8 slices ham
1 tub ricotta
1 egg white, 1 tsp water for glazing

Roll out dough to thin round circle. Lay the ham and provolone cheese around the outer part, spread mozzarella and fontina cheese evenly. Pour the ricotta in the middle. Invisibly divide the dough into 4 pieces, fold over each piece, leaving the ricotta in the middle exposed. The dough should look like a wreath, with a whole in the middle. Glaze the outside with the egg wash. Place in oven at 425 degrees for 15 minutes or until golden brown.