1 label does not fit all

Monday night we celebrated my 9 year olds birthday party with his friends. His birthday was last month but because we were in transition of moving, he had to wait to have his party. He invited 15 boys from his school and he planned an outdoor hockey game.

Now a day’s many children suffer from allergies; something foreign to me when I was growing up. For some reason, allergies did not exist back in the day. I don’t remember my mother worrying about the food she would be serving at the parties, because kids were able to eat anything and everything.

I was very careful when I bought the food for the party. There are some kids in Joseph’s class that have specific food allergies. I planned to order pizza, make some chicken nuggets and fries. I went out on Sunday to prepare for the Monday night festivities. I read all the labels and I felt confident I was prepared. The cake was peanut free, and to be safe, I bought certified Nut free cupcakes for the children who suffer from a peanut allergy.

The party began right after school and everything was set up outside. I cut up some oranges, veggies and dip, some spreads with pita, and the pizza and other food was almost ready. The mothers who have children with allergies come prepared. In a total of 17 kids there was 1 boy with diabetes. His mom asked me to note what he eats because she needed to give him the appropriate amount of insulin. 1 boy brought his own food because he has a gluten allergy. 2 boys had peanut allergies; 1 boy a wheat allergy and another boy is allergic to sesame seeds.

I was very careful preparing the food. There was no peanut anything in sight and the party began. My friend Brenda (who is a mother to 1 of the boys) was there to help and another mother who has 2 boys with allergies was also there. The boys came periodically to munch on some snacks while they were playing and waiting for the food. As I was speaking to Luke’s mom (Diana), one of the boys (with the sesame allergy) says to me, “Diana, my tongue feels funny.” I stopped and looked at him and quickly asked, “What’s wrong?” I began to panic and tried to figure out why this kid who has an allergy would be saying something like that? I quickly asked him what he had eaten and he told me the pita bread. I ran to the kitchen to read the ingredients on the package (again) to make sure there are no sesame seeds and I realized it was ok and safe for him to eat. I just thought he was mistaken and that he was ok. Then he told me he ate the hummus that was there. I thought ok, it should be fine there is no sesame in that. I WAS WRONG! Apparently there is sesame paste in hummus! Only after I saw in small brackets that tahini is made with it. I again began to panic and I didn’t know what to do.

Diana (Luke’s mom) was an allergy expert so she quickly took action. She grabbed her purse and took out the Benadryl; I grabbed the phone to call his mother. I did not know what the heck I was going to say to this mother who trusted me with her son. When she answered I said, “Please don’t panic but Leandro had some hummus.” She automatically said, “oh no.” Then I freaked out again. She asked me some questions, “Is he coughing? Is he breathing ok? Is he swelling up?” I felt like I was in a daze and I did not even see what else was going on around me. “Oh my God, what should I do?” Diana grabbed his epi pen in his knapsack and was waiting. Leandro’s mom was on her way.

He seemed ok. He was not coughing, swelling or breathing funny. He did have a little rash on his lips and he was rubbing his eyes. I was trying so hard to keep calm but it was almost impossible to do. I began saying, “I am such a bad mother, I can’t believe what I did.” I had no idea that hummus has anything but chick peas and garlic? I kept an eye on him until his mother got there.

I kept approaching him and making sure he was ok. At one point when I went over to see him and look at his face he looked at me with his cute eyes and innocently asked me “Am I going to die?” My heart just stopped. I tried hard not to cry and hide under a rock and I said, “I will die before you..I promise.” I walked away and felt like I was the worst person in the whole world.
His mother arrived shortly after and assessed him. The Benadryl had helped and he was doing fine. I apologized over and over and she reassured me that it was not my fault and that he knows not to have hummus.

When I was planning my son’s 9th birthday, I thought about the food; I thought about the loot bags, and I thought about the entertainment. I thought I knew about the special risks for the kids with allergies. I thought I knew that an allergy is common and easy to plan for. I thought I knew that I should know what is safe and what is not. I could not have been more wrong. Ordering a cake that is peanut free was not enough. Reading the labels to make sure there are no nuts was not enough. Deciding if I should get vanilla or a chocolate cake was not enough, even if it guaranteed to be peanut free. Peanut free does not guarantee allergy free for all, because when it comes to allergies, 1 label does not fit all, and Monday night I experienced it first hand.
That’s my peace today!

Nut free Cupcakes
3 cups flour
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
3/4 tsp salt
12 tablespoons unsalted butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
4 large eggs
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 1/4 cups milk

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line muffin pan with cupcake holders or grease if you are not using holders. In a bowl whisk flour, salt and baking powder. In another bowl cream butter and sugar for 4 min. Add egg 1 at a time, beat in vanilla. Add flour mixture alternatly with milk in the butter mixture. combine and scoop into pan. Bake for 20 minutes.