Take the pickle out...once in a while!

We just came back from a wonderful family vacation in Florida. We really needed the get away from the winter weather and the stress of home. We had not been away since before the twins were born, so it was a well deserved venture.

We booked the trip a month in advance so it was quite the wait for us and the kids. Finally the day arrived and we were ready to part from the cold Toronto weather. I was a little nervous because I do not love to fly, in fact, I hate to fly. The kids were all ready to go and so were we. I was wondering how the twins would behave on the plane because it was their first time.

We board the plane and it was packed! There was not 1 seat available. We went to our designated seats and I was sitting next to my 2 daughters and the boys were sitting next to Franco. I bought headphones for the kids to use when they wanted to watch the in flight movies. The first hour went by without a hitch. The kids were good and quiet. After the second hour, Jenna began getting antsy and she wanted out. She wanted out of her chair, out of her section, and out of the airplane. I didn't think that was a good idea.lol. She is 2 1/2 years old. She is at the age where she kind of understands, but she does not quite understand the threats like the older ones do.lol.

I tried very hard to keep her calm. I tried very hard to keep her quiet. I tried very hard to keep her still...FAIL...FAIL...FAIL. Nothing was working. People around us began to get agitated. Some smiled and understood, and others...not so much. The people in front of us were visibly annoyed with this little toddler of mine. I kept apologizing but they were not being receptive. After a little while, the flight attendant came up to us and tried to talk to Jenna..lol..Negative. She just looked at her and continued to squirm out of her chair. I was embarrassed on one end, and livid on the other. I turned behind to look at my husband for help, he barely knew what was going on because he had the head phones on and was watching the same movie as my 2 boys were..lol.. great!
It was almost 730pm and this was normally Jenna's bedtime so she was just cranky and tired. After some begging, smiling, and passing off candy to her she calmed down and she eventually fell asleep. Phew. We landed at 830pm and she was as happy as she is the moment she wakes up. On the way back we left at an earlier time in the day so she was calm, happy and excited to be flying in the air again.

I am sure many parents have had stressful times like these before. You become so desperate to calm your children down that you forget how angry you are that these "people" are being so mean and uncompassionate. If you are a parent then you should try to remember a time that your toddler had a rough time calming down. I can understand if it was my 9 year old son. He is totally capable of knowing good behaviour from bad.

A few days after I came back from my trip, I was having lunch with some colleagues of mine. We were at a Japanese restaurant discussing some work stuff. As we were speaking we kept getting disrupted by this screaming young child across the way from us. A couple of my coworkers began showing their dismay with this screaming toddler. I carried on the conversation like normal (maybe I am just so conditioned to noise, I now drown it out..lol) We kind of just smirked and figured this child is its mother's problem, not ours.

As we were eating lunch, I couldn't help but hear 2 women talking at another table about this child who was clearly not happy. They were going on and on about how kids should behave and how parents should discipline their children and so on and so on. Then they carried on to talk about how kids should be seen and not heard and just going on and on and on. A part of me was biting my tongue trying my darn best not to speak, but the part of me that just went through the judgmental stares I had just experienced days before on my plane ride to Florida, was bursting at the seams. This child was a small 18 mth old little girl. Her mother was trying her best to calm her down and to figure out what was bothering her. I sympathised with this woman because I understand how stressful a situation like this one can be.

I couldn't take it any longer, I had to speak. I turned around to the 2 women. 1 of the women looked like she was just out of high school, and the other looked like she had something stuck up her a-hole. I calmly looked at these judgemental women, I smiled and I said, "I know it kind of sucks having to listen to the screaming child, but instead of talking about this mother, or her "bad" child, maybe you can try to put yourself in her position and how hard it is for her right now ." I calmly turned back around, got my coat and I left. but Not before I walked up to the mother with her child, that she had now calmed down, and said to her, "I know how you feel..it's ok eventually they grow up and leave us" She laughed, I laughed and I know at that moment she felt better.

In life, we decide that judging people is easier to do than helping them. How is it any different if that women would have fallen and asked someone to help her up? Half the time we get stressed in a situation like that because we feel nervous at what others may think of us, or our children.

A child that is having a bad moment is not a bad child. A child that is having a small tantrum in a public place, is not a bad child. A mother who is having a hard moment with her child, is not a bad mother. A mother who is having a hard time calming her child that is having a tantrum, is not a bad mother. She is just trying her best to go through the little bumps and turns on the journey of motherhood. She is just hoping that other mothers will be understanding and sympathetic, and she is just wishing that people would help, more than they judge, and to maybe take that pickle out of their a** ,once in a while!
That's my peace today!

I thought this recipe was suited for the blog..lol

Jarred Pickles
Baby cucumbers (however many you want to make...1/2 bushel makes 10 jars)
Pickled salt
garlic pieces
bunches of fresh dill

Scrub pickles with a brush. Keep overnight in cold water. In a large pot, boil 4 cups water with 2 cups vinigar, add 10 tablespoons of pickling salt (you will need more if you are doing 10 jars so just keep adding evenly)
Sterilize Mason jar and fill with dry pickles, pieces of garlic and bunches of dill. Add boiling water mixture to the jars and seal tightly. Pickles are ready after about a month. (make sure the lids pop once they are sealed for a few minutes)