It hurts me a lot more than it hurts you

So this is the last time I will write about Joseph and his hockey..lol...I promise. This past weekend we had the semi-finals (we won) and then on Sunday we had the finals. You can tell in the dressing room before the game began, all the kids were very nervous. They made it to the finals and they wanted to win the cup; the championship. When you work really hard at something, the biggest reward is recognition. So anyway, the coach prepped them up with a little chat, and away they went to play the last game of the season.

It was supposed to be an easy game for us. We had played this team in the playoffs and we beat them pretty badly. Our goalie was a lot better than theirs..lol.(wink wink). So the game began and what a game it was. It was one of the most nail biting, stressful games thus far. In the end, they beat us 2-1. 1 goal away from winning first place.

After the game was over, the kids with their heads down, poured into the dressing room, and if I think about their little faces I can just cry. They were all crying, some hysterically, some quietly. There was no room for positive talk, or words of “You guys did great!” They did not want to hear it. I will admit they did not play a strong game; the other team was all over us. We seem to forget that kids are just kids. They were nervous and could not handle the pressure. Our team would normally score at least 3-4 goals a game, but not this game. The only shot they took on the goalie was the only goal we got.

As parents, we never like to see our kids cry, or be sad. As much as we can tell them that they did well, or that we are proud of them, we cannot take the hurt away. All the parents that day were trying their best to take away the tears. The boys were sad and they wanted to be sad. They didn’t look at it that they won second overall (which is awesome), they looked at it that they lost. There was no celebrating “silver”, they wanted “gold”.

The good thing about being a kid is that they are resilient. After an hour of Joseph sulking and feeling sad, and a few tears..ok a lot of tears..lol..and him saying he did not want to be goalie anymore...he was laughing outside. He was still upset and was not thrilled they lost, but he decided he will continue to play in net. I know that is not something I want, but he wants it so I have to support that. We reassured him that he played an awesome game, and that if it was not for him we would have lost 20-1. We had to let him know that he did the best he could, but he was not the whole team. After a few hours we received an email from his coach addressed to him. They were words of encouragement and he explained to Joseph that if it was not for him, they would not have even made it to the finals. That made Joseph feel proud again, and confident again.

Parents are always there to wipe away the tears from their kid’s faces. They are always there to offer words of love and encouragement, and they are always there to see the bright side of things. Even though we hurt more than they do. Even though we feel like crying a lot harder for them, and even though we want more for them than they do. We must be strong, we must be teachers, and we must be leaders. We must show them that life is what you make it, life is how you see it, and life is full of the next best opportunity. So when Joseph said to me, “Mommy why aren’t you upset that we lost?” I wanted to scream out and cry with him, and hold his tiny little body and comfort him, but that’s not my job. My job is to stay strong, show him that it should be just for fun and to not take it to heart. I really wanted to respond to my little baby, “Oh Joseph, I feel so horrible you guys lost.” I wanted to tell him that it hurt me a lot more, than it hurt him, but I couldn’t.... because that’s not my job to do.
That’s my peace today!

Steak Sandwich
3-4 strip loin steaks cut into thin strips
2 red peppers cut into strips
1 whole onion cut thinly
2 cups sliced mushrooms
6-8 slices provolone cheese
olive oil for frying
6 italian buns
shredded lettuce and chopped tomatoes (optional)

Add 5 tbsp oil to pan and add steak, salt and pepper. Fry for about 5-7 minutes remove from pan. Add all veggies, add 2 tbsp oil to pan, fry for 7-8 minutes. Slice open buns stuff with steak and veggies, add sliced cheese. Put on a baking pan and broil in oven for 6 minutes at 400 degrees. Add lettuce and tomato(optional)