Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Just keep swimming...

Over the weekend i took my kids to watch Finding Dory. It is the sequel to Finding Nemo. Which was one of my favourite movie of all time.  The numbers at the box office were astounding, as everyone flocked to the big screen to watch it.

The movie was cute and funny (I won't ruin it for those who have yet to see it). I think Disney has a perfect way of creating wonderful messages for children to capture. The best part though, is that most of the time, the adults are the ones that take those messages and relate them to their own life and experiences.

I have been on this earth for quite some time now. I will not divulge, but i can hint that it is more than 25 and less than 100. :) And, in these many years of my life on this earth I have seen, lived and experienced quite a bit. Some things welcomed, and some, not so much.

Most of us talk about having children as being the pinnacle points in our lives, and for most of us, that holds true, but if i stop and think back to my younger years, I can tell you that i had lots of really important times in my life. Like getting my licence, that was a HUGE deal. It provided a freedom to me that I had never had before, it also came with the responsibility of being safe and paying attention to signs, I'm not going to lie, it was really scary! Then there was my choice of school. After high school I needed to decide who i was going to be for the rest of my life. Really? That's a huge deal, isn't it? I started off in one field and i ended up in a completely different one. I realized that my original choice wasn't for me so I didn't pause and cry, i just moved toward the area of study that was more like me. Which of course turned out to be talking, interviewing, and socializing in the broadcast world, not so terrible. :)

My point is, that in every stage my life was different and filled with different experiences. Very important decisions and choices. Along the way i met some really special people; people that have become very important to me in my adult life. There were also situations that happened to me that didn't feel great or hurt me at the time; and I lived those as well.

When I was little, my parents, like most parents, tried their best to protect me from the world. From all things evil, bad and scary. They did their best to shield me when i needed to be protected, and help me when I was in trouble. The one thing my parents did a great job of, was teaching me how to get up and shake it off. Whether it was from a fall off my bike or a fight with my friend or maybe not achieving what i expected. They didn't allow me to dwell. Instead, they decided to tell me that it was done and over and i need to be strong, move on and it will be ok!

I consider myself to be a logical person, a person that tries her best to live well and be well and love well. I am far from perfect. Anyone who knows me, knows i recognize, that me and perfect are most often, opposite. But i try my best to get up off the bike, rub the blood off my scrapes and get back on.

If we all gave up when it got hard, or when we fell would we ever accomplish what he have? Sometimes the hardest things have the most impact, on who we are and what we discover. I try to mimic my parents's philosophy of "suck it up butter cup", and sometimes i get scowls from my kids because they think I may be a bit harsh, ok, who am I kidding, most people think that sometimes I am a bit harsh. But my kids know that I am trying to teach them that life will get hard, not maybe, but it WILL get hard at times. There will be decisions that they will make that can greatly impact many years of their lives. They will fall and scrape their knees, they will fail at some things, and they will meet people that will intentionally hurt them. And when that happens, I  hope and pray that they remember my words and my belief, like the ones my parents taught me.

Staying still when you are hurting or making a big decision to change something, may feel the most comfortable and less complicated, and I understand that. But if you try and get up and push through it, i promise you, that moving feels a lot better in the end. Move forward and be excited for the next day, the next moment and the next happy time. My kids will know that they can get up, move on and just keep swimming, just keep swimming, so they can have the opportunity to discover the world and all things wonderful.

that's my peace today!

Tuesday, June 21, 2016

The value of life

We usually only talk about life and how precious it is after we hear something terrible or life altering that happened; an illness or someone who passed away too young, it is then that we take the time to reflect and think about our own lives and the true value of it.

Time is so precious, it is most often taken for granted and it is the most important thing we don't even own. We buy material items because it makes us feel important, it makes us look pretty and it makes us comfortable. Yes people, even 6 inch high heeled shoes make us "comfortable".

We fill our lives with things, items, objects. The latest purse, the hottest pair of shoes and the skinniest of skinniest pair of jeans. I am the first to admit that retail therapy feels damn good. I can just lose myself in a shoe store or a sale rack, and who the hell doesn't love to spend a rainy Saturday afternoon at Homesense??

Life is super stressful and we get mixed up in all the chaos. We go go go and we can't wait for the day to end, only to begin the same routine the next morning. Some of us work full time and have kids in activities, sports and of course homework; lots of it. We maybe take a couple of weeks a year vacationing with the family, spend some hours on the weekends visiting family and friends and then we have to clean the house, make the meals and do grocery shopping in between. Kids have to be showered, bedtime snacks, stories, and sleep time negotiations. I swear, my kids could negotiate with the government if they had a chance. (Who am I kidding, nobody can negotiate with the Canadian government).

My point is that we continue this fast paced cycle and it's not even because we want to, its because we think we have to. We maintain a life we consider to be the right one for our kids. We want to make our children's lives as fun filled, material filled and device filled as we possible can. Why? because they ask us. why do we do it? because we just do. Then something terrible happens, we hear tragic news about a loved one, or something that happened to someone else's child and we pause. We stop in our tracks. We cry and we ache for those parents. We ache for the families and we promise ourselves to never miss an opportunity to hug our kids and tell our parents we love them.
We then begin to talk about how precious life is. How we need to slow down and enjoy our children, because age 7 will never come around again, once they turn 8. We look at pictures of them when they were babies and ask ourselves how the time just went by so quickly. We pray that they will always be safe, happy and healthy. We realize then, how we should enjoy every day as much as we possibly can.

Life is precious and time should be treasured. We are gifts on this earth, we have purpose and meaning. We can treat it the same way we handle babies, puppies and children; with a smile, a soft embrace and protect it from all things evil.  Handle it with care, smile at it everyday, laugh when you can make it laugh and always show love! For it is only then, we will truly be able to appreciate the value of life.

That's  my peace today


Thursday, June 16, 2016

Hang on, it may just be a bumpy ride!

Life has a funny way of well, being life.

When we are little we were encouraged to roll with the punches, count every day as a blessing and thank the lord every night when we lay our tiny heads on our pillows at night.

As parents we try our hardest to protect our kids from just about everything! When they are newborns its about protecting them from germs so they don't catch a cold, when they are toddlers its about food and choking, and as teens, oh lord, its just about everything! Every street they cross and every person they will encounter, and of course, every picture they share on Instagram!

But as the days pass and the years go by, they learn. They learn that every single day is different and every new experience will make them into who they are. Its challenging though to teach them that. Humans tend to be most comfortable as status quo, stable, untouched and not shifted. Maybe we stay in the same home, at the same job or with the same hair style forever!

Change is scary, it is uncomfortable to most people, and it can actually bring on anxiety to some. But what I have learned over my years of growing up and especially while being a mom, is that without change we cannot grow. If we continue to be who we were without bringing forth our experiences then we would still be that 2 year old toddler that our mothers' protected from choking and drowning. If we choose to accept things just because they are easier, then we will never get to the place we were perhaps meant to be.

Recently I read the book The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, (I actually read it along side my 15 year old son). He had to read it for Grade 9 English class and I thought if I read it with him it would be easier for us to have discussions. I learned a lot by reading this book. Besides learning that a 15 year old doesn't think reading is actually a great pass time, I also learned about our personal journeys. I learned that we all have the opportunity to take a different the path, maybe even the one we were actually meant to follow so we can achieve our personal legend; the person that was placed on this earth.

The main character met people along the way, he opened his heart and his mind to their teachings. He trusted in his belief that the road (scary and challenging) was the road that would potentially bring him the most happiness. Not only was this story a great teaching for my 15 year old son, it also helped me gain perspective of lessons and teachings of others. The main character began to realize that sometimes the safe road is not always the best one. It may be for some, but definitely not for all. And to the ones that choose to take the road less traveled, the road with the scary encounters and questioning directions, it is ok, it is ok to want to go down that road.

Change is scary but it doesn't mean you wont adjust. It may take some time with every alteration you make, but eventually you adapt. We as humans become resilient to our choices, because it is those choices that make us who we were meant to be in the first place. And sometimes when you make changes in your life, those around you don't like it, it makes them feel uncomfortable and it makes them feel out of control. Sometimes people forget what they were taught when they were little; roll with the punches, count your blessings and thank the lord every night for life.

Live a great life, try and be the best person you can be. If that means to stay in that same home with that same haircut then so be it, but if it means something different to you, then so be that too!

Everyone has the right to foster their own legend and to pursue their own personal journey. Treasure and happiness means something different to all of us, make your own definition for both. Take what you learned from your own parents and teach it to your children. The great and fantastic part of that is that your children will hear it differently then how you said it, but that's ok because that is how they want to hear it. Love them, protect them and tell them that change is not bad, at times it is scary, but never let fear stop you from growing.

Life is wonderful and great, at the end, we need to be ok with every choice we have made in our lives. Never regret anything that made you smile. Even if it was a brown fringed suede jacket in Grade 8, if you liked it, then perfect! I hope we can all continue our journey to find our own personal legend, I hope that especially for my own children. And when they do, I will remind them to hang on tight, it may just be a bumpy ride!

That's my peace today!